my day off

shhit its been a really long week i havent really been doing anything except for school then work or school then class....thank god today i got the day off today...i was supposed to go to San Pedro with my cousin because its her birthday but my dad is being a little a-hole and does not want to drive us to their home in the o.c.
so this is a little description of my day....

first wake up around 9
go on myspace
i see my brother is not here (yay)
go get breakfast at my favorite restaurant arrys<333

come home eat it while watching family guy :]
now im blogging

so far its been a good morning
i dont know what to do today
well i have some errands to do so i think ill get that outta my way
then around 9pm there is going to be a show at this restaurant on whittier blvd.
and my old flame is the guitarist in the band i might go to that...
but im kinda scared because i havent talked to him like in 3-4 months i dont know what ill say to him....or even if ill get the guts to say hi....idk
stay tuned

nostalgia kills

so today i went to buy my clothes for my training at applebee's and i was waiting at this bus stop next to a liquor store. sadly this liquor store holds a lot of memories for me. about a year ago i remember being there in the morning and afternoons, it was my mecca. the owner sold liquor to anyone and it was 2 blocks away from my house. it was across the street to a park too. i was there with my so called friends that are strangers to me now and this guy i had the biggest crush on & i thought i was "in love" (whatever that may be). we would spend our money on beer or cheap vodka and go to the park and drink. we drank to get fucking wasted. that block is a reminder of how lost i was even though im not fully found i am not as i used to be and i am far more intelligent now than i was. we drank and we fucking drank... some of us to get away from our lives, others for fun, others to fit in. im so glad im not like that anymore. its like when i look back i do not recognize who that was. im growing up. today standing there on the same street about 50 feet away made me realize i miss it but im glad im not there right now wasting my time i also cringed a little...i cringe whenever my dad drives by there im almost embarrased of how truly fucking stupid and irresponsible i was and to think it was only but a year ago i was only 16 turning on seventeen. now im seventeen turning on eighteen this may. i look back at those times and laugh but it also kills me a little bit each time. it was like a closure getting on that bus, riding it forward buying job clothes instead of booze. standing there it was the same pavement,same owners still working there but a completely different jackie. sadly some of the people i knew are the same and they don't recognize me now.im trying to get past this and it fades away each day slowly.

psychology&_________

i was recently at boarders book store looking for a new book to read, i was in the psychology section looking for the book the doors of perception..and instead found all these books with a television show and psychology for example "psychology and seinfeld" at first i was like oh this is so cool but then i found more of them with different shows like the simpsons... i was like "wth? lol i wonder if im a jerry,kramer,george,elaine or maybe even a newman" haha so basically i was fascinated especially by seinfeld because that show is now one of my favorites...i didnt know such literature existed (gasp) now i know though :]




sadly i could not find this book
:[

essay banquet

so today was my essay banquet at the Quiet Cannon.
the food was good and the room was very classy lol...
i got there and they told me i had to read it out loud in front of the room i was like "oh fuck" "oh nooo!" no one tole me that was gonna happen....so i grew a pair as my brother said what else could i do run out? the thing is maybe if they would of informed me earlier instead of being total bitches i wouldnt of been as nervous as i was....i got up there and i was shaking i was so nervous i was sure everyone could see it also and that only made me wanna shake more...the worst was if i took a gulp my voice would just like shut down on me...so i kinda read it fast but overall i was glad that i read it...and i was happy when everyone was clapping for me...after all that i got 2nd place...150 bucks..aint too shabby...

old town pasadena

i love old town pasadena even though its like the so. cal capital of fucking hipsters (ughghghh)
well i went today and it was pretty fucking fun :] i hung out with my homies lol.
old town pasadena is so nice and so white and so expensive....ive spent many nights hanging in the sidewalks just chaain smoking and enjoying the buildings and company around me...to me old town reminds me of the simpler moments in life and about my friends...so many good memories have gone on there that its worth the hour and a half bus ride from atlantic blvd. to fair oaks. well of course today was not any different at all...

we started off blazing out of two pieces at the ol' grass alley thats another spot the grass alley where the mhs youth goes and blazes :] .... well after we blazed we went to check out some yard sales my friend was asking if the dog was for sale too lol
then we had the sickest munchies and we ate at in-n-out i think it was possibly the best in-n-out ever in my life <3 god it was good hahaha.... after that we took the bus and got to old town there me and my friend met up with our two other friends and immediately did the cigs come one right after the other in front of this yummy mediterranean restaurant...after that free stuff kept coming to me we went to M.A.C. where i got free eye shadow whoo! then i went to lush and got a free sample of this face mask that i will use tomorrow! the weed was free too :]we also went to the apple store and took pics lol
and then i went to urban outfitters and got a free subscription to my favorite magazine Nylon! yeah boy i love free things.
i also went to forever 21 and it was huge its two floors :] i was trying to find a skirt or dress for the essay banquet thing but sadly i could not find anything :[ but overall it was a good day full of chain smoking, free shit and randomness from my friend thats on some kind of new medication which made her totally fucking hyper it was so funny.....everytime we go to old town we find out something new about the city about our friendship it brings us together....that town makes us feel happy and gives us a rush of sorts...we always have talks about moving there one day hopefully it will happen


:] lol

oh yeah!

my ethics essay that i turned in at my old school was chosen for the finals
:] yaaayyyyy i totally forgot that i even wrote it until my mom told me yesterday that a teacher called for me and said something about a lunch for the essay finalists...its been a month since ive turned it in so i just assumed that my essay lost or something like that....whoa im happy..but yeah there is gonna be a lunch and im not gonna be at school most of the day!!...i wonder who is gonna win the whole scholarship..wish me luck people maybe ill win it! (knock on wood)
oohhh yeaeeaahhhh!!!!

little kids

little kids should not be singing "low" by flo-rida....
my little kid neighbors ages 7-10 were singing it right now....yeah thats not fucking cool its creepy...
damn most kids are trying to grow up too fast now a days i hate that.
there all trying to look cute and the media is always sending out messages like if your not cute you wont be popular and boys wont like you.
i remember being in middle school and feeling like that uncool and feeling like shit most days... its sad to think that kids are going through that also and with more technology in the palm of their hands i can only imagine how much harder it is on them....with myspace and facebook and whatever else...and boys aren't immune either the message i think being sent to them is being a "pimp" is cool
im sick and tired of all that it disgusts me what kind of pressure human beings put on each other.......it all starts so early too :[
fuck what happened to innocence?
wheres it all gone?

damn u

today was actually a good day of old shitty crushes that died and new cute guy that ill learn more of in the coming days (well im hoping) it was also a day of old friends that i havent seen and of course new awesome friends it was a hell of a good day im happy:]
& damn u blogger i tried to publish a blog but then it kept fucking up on me so whatever i got too lazy and i forgot what i was gonna write ahhh i hate when this happens :p
so im just gonna sign out



anthony bourdain google him or watch his show "no reservations" i love him and you will too :]

byeeeeeeeee<333333333333

it happened

ever since i found out about the movie the wall and weed and how people said its a good match i knew that i wanted to do that hhaha....so yesterday i went to my friends kickback i drank a lil vodka slushee and then got in the circle lol it was so funny cuz my friends cousin was there and he was acting so fucking retarted saying the stupidest shit and freaking me out... he was gone....then we went to the room and we were still blazing it but now out of the mini bong i got blown...wow i could not fucking move at all it was great....so we were just there watching the movie i was stuck on it obviously well i couldnt really move....i was tripping out on it like crazy kinda still am...but i was more excited on how im faded and watching the wall like its an experience like a right of passage for stoners i guess.....but IM NOT A STONER id like to get that clear....im just an hey i got weed oh really?break it out kinda person....if its there hey then why not.......oh and then my friend was saying did pink really make all of that movie....that was the funniset part of my day :] haha